I have often contemplated about the repercussions of doing things in an emotional state of anger or frustration (or both). I remember as a kid I'd often be assigned a task by my parents (let's say vacuuming) and when I did it in a state if frustration or anger the experience was less than pleasurable. I'd usually end up stubbing my toe or breaking something and things would snowball from there.
I have also observed this with my daughters. Recently, my older daughter was asked to help her younger sister clean her fish tank. She was furious, because she had already cleaned her fish’s tank, and made it clear that she felt it wasn't her responsibility and she should not have to help! I often instill in my children that we are All a part if the household, so we All have to contribute, even when we do things for another. So she reluctantly went to work on the Emma's (her sister's beta fish) bowl.
Much to Emma's doom, my older daughter was terse and jerky in her movements and dropped Emma down the drain into the garbage disposal! My dad's heroic efforts attempted to save Emma, but sadly Emma transitioned within 24 hours. My younger daughter was very sad, but was quickly consoled with a new beta fish, who she named Victor. Yet, I can’t help but wonder if Emma would still with us if the energy behind cleaning her fish tank would have been different.
I also had a recent temper tantrum which added proof to my theory. It was the day after Christmas, and being off from work and school, I was ready to enjoy some down time…after finishing the laundry. When I went to separate the clothes I saw the mountain was the equivalent of three weeks’ worth of laundry. I was furious because I had just done all of the laundry less than a week before hand.
My investigation proved that my younger daughter was trying on clothes and instead of putting them back in place, she would just toss them in the hamper. There was no determining which clothes were dirty and which were clean. So I tersely resolved to have my kids help me take the clothes to the washateria, as this would be the only way we would finish that day!
We quickly separated the clothes and were off. Each of the girls did their part, and in spite of my bad attitude the girls were laughing and enjoying the “field trip”. I was too stuck in myself to partake and enjoy the fun. Then the washers began to stop and it was time to start drying the clothes and I had another surprise waiting on me…
The moment I opened the washer with the whites, I was flooded with thoughts! “Oh, no…the blue sharpie that was in my pocket! I forgot to empty pockets like I normally do!!!” Then I felt a cold chill run through me! Yep…I ruined a pair of pajamas, two blouses, a pair of under garments and some socks!
Scientifically, I cannot prove that it was my bad attitude (or negative energy as I like to call it) that caused all of this to happen. I do have to stop and ask myself if a different perspective and attitude would have created a different outcome. A side from that, I missed the perfect opportunity to spend some pleasurable time with my girls. Sure, we were doing laundry (3 weeks worth of it), but that doesn’t mean I had to be a miser!
So I have to stop and ask myself how to avoid this in the future. One solution is to stop what I’m doing until I have a clearer mind and can think clearly. Another is to re-frame my thinking and find the good in the situation. These steps may not always generate a perfect outcomes, but at least my theory will have been tested! :)